Comments for Team Gray!

Comment on Pageant Update by Angela

Angela — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 19:01:44 +0000

From Julie: I am freaking out trying to learn how to make my two daughters’ buns for gym meets, so I’m not about to sign them up for anything else. The only thing that might deepen our relationship out of that was if I could learn to keep my mouth shut rather than making them feel bad about forcing me to learn bun techniques.

Comment on Is black the only detail we notice in different people? by Angela

Angela — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 19:00:06 +0000

Julie wanted to weigh in, but couldn’t because of technical difficulties. She told me what she wanted to say in email, so I’ll post it: I have trouble recognizing people sometimes who are teenagers (white), even one who lives next door to me, when I see her in a group or out of context. Also, I used to have a lot of trouble distinguishing between gym moms at the gym. Something about how they dress. Again white women. Once I know someone I’m good, but before that I sometimes have trouble. I also said something to the effect that I think people do tend to do a visual categorization based on immediate impressions to recognize people at first. If you belong to a group, racial or cultural or class, you might have enough familiarity to distinguish (that word is really hard to type) certain traits (shades of brown eyes or whatever) that might not be noticeable to someone not in the group. That might include skin color or hair color or whatever. This might explain the all-look-alike thing somewhat. And some people might be more careless than others about noticing things.

I think this is an interesting post that deserves more exploration. How do people recognize others, and at what point do you know someone well enough to look past their immediately noticeable traits? Also, do you ever have trouble telling people apart? White or black or Asian, for example? How about blonds? I have trouble with that sometimes, because their really light hair is so noticeable that I miss the rest of them at first. So I don’t think it has to be an insult or anything if some white people get you mixed up with another black woman. It would seem to indicate that they don’t know you too well, though.

Comment on When your Christianity kicks in by Mackey Roberson

Mackey Roberson — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 16:39:50 +0000

Man, are you living my life!!!! I had almost the exact set of circustances a few weeks back. With the exception that we were attending a potluck for our 4-H group, the rest of the details were almost identical. Except my daughter is 13 as are her peers . I’m proud of you though and the way you chose to handle this. I left ANGRY and seething!!! Never really resolved the issue and have not spoken to my friend in a few weeks because I’m sick of my kid being the one who does all the chasing! Although, I don’t want any child to be treated this way, I’m a novice at coping skills for dealing with this. I’ve got a loooonnnggg way to go.

Comment on Is black the only detail we notice in different people? by Mackey Roberson

Mackey Roberson — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 16:32:16 +0000

Totally understand you here. Unfortunately, I have no solutions. I have just “let it go”when it has happened in the past. Probably not the right way to handle it, but it’s water under the bridge now. I have however used these moments as teachable moments with my own children . I NEVER allow them to identify someone by their race only. They must be very descriptive when identifying someone to me in casual conversation. There again , this may not solve the problem, but I am attempting to teach my own to be better.

Comment on Letting go in stages by Mackey Roberson

Mackey Roberson — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 16:24:14 +0000

Awwww. Super excited for you guys and wish the best to your”little BIG girl”. Can’t wait to read your blogs about this journey. you inspired me to be a better mom . Happy Monday ladybug!!!

Comment on Letting go in stages by Julie

Julie — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 14:12:38 +0000

You painted such a clear picture, Angela, of this exciting, nervous, somewhat heart-wrenching time for you and your daughter and the whole family. She is really spreading her wings…

Comment on Is black the only detail we notice in different people? by Mrs. Banks

Mrs. Banks — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 04:08:59 +0000

I understand how you feel Angela. My advice would be to not let it bother you. This shows lack on the part of the individual who can’t differentiate the faces of 2 individuals.

Comment on Why parents should raise children together by Angela

Angela — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 03:48:56 +0000

Wow, Mackey! I know that must be tough. It’s a good thing you two work together. It’ good for the kids to see you all making the commitment to your family together. I know you live for those 7 days! I would too.

Comment on Why parents should raise children together by Mackey Roberson

Mackey Roberson — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 15:31:19 +0000

My hubby works 12 hour rotating shifts. His schedule breaks down so that he works 15days a month and he is off for 15 days a month. And 7 of his 15 off days each month are consecutive. The 12 hr day shifts are rough but bearable because at least I know he’ll be home for the dinner, bath, bed tasks. The 12 hr night shifts are gut wrenching. They remind me why it’s important to have the two-parent strategy at play while tackling the tasks of keeping my seven kid household running smoothly. I handle a large part of the schooling for the children but hubs handles the Math instruction. I absolutely ADORE him for that. I loathe math , even more than I loathe his 12 hr night shifts. Suffice it to say, I LIVE for his 7 day stretch away from the office every month. Not just me, the enitre household does. And we fill those seven days with all family activities .

Comment on Back from the Amish by Mackey Roberson

Mackey Roberson — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 15:05:55 +0000

I’m still chugging at it too. I feel discouraged at times and frustrated that I did not finish “the list” for the day. I believe you’re right about homeschooling adding to the mess. I look at friends who have immaculate homes. then I remember, their kids leave for 9-10 hrs a dady leaving them plenty of time to keep it tight around he house. I daily remind myself that I we are giving our children the best of us and our resources and our time. This is priceless. In the grand scope of things. As long as I chug at it and keep things realtively tidy, maybe I won’ have a kid show up on A&E in twenty years on an episode of “Hoarders”. ; ) Thanks for the encouragement!!